Do you ever find yourself looking at someone and thinking, Wow, she’s got it all together. You see her with her perfect hair or her perfect body or her perfect family and find yourself tormented by the fictitious story you have scripted about the palace she lives in with the white picket fence filled with happiness, laughter and joy. You stare at her and wonder how she got so lucky. Here you stand up against her and feel you have nothing. You have absolutely nothing and she has everything, absolutely everything.
Before you get any farther, let’s stop. Just STOP.
Theodore Roosevelt said it best. He said Comparison is the thief of joy. And boy oh boy did he nail it with that one. One of the absolute worst things we can do in life is compare ourselves, what we have, who we are, etc. to others. So let’s save ourselves the time and just cut it out.
Oh wait, it’s not that easy is it?
I caught myself recently aching over what I saw when I looked at another who had everything that I wanted. If you have been around here for long enough you know that my husband and I have lost two babies over the past two years. It has been absolute hell and no matter what anyone says or does, every month of trying to hold onto hope becomes harder and harder. Every time I see another woman pushing along a stroller or showing off her pregnant belly, I instinctively get a pain in my own stomach and some days I just don’t think I can take it anymore. But I was recently taught a very powerful lesson in relation to this.
The girl who taught me this lesson may actually have no idea the impact she had on me. It was one of those days I was really down. I felt like everyone I came in contact with that day was pregnant or had just had a baby. Everyone’s happiness over baby fever was exaggerated that day. I was at my wit’s end and then, there she was. So beautiful with the glows of pregnancy. One of those girl’s that is just radiant. And her heart is just as golden so you just have to love her. She was pregnant with her second baby and the two little ones would only be 13 months apart. She was certainly going to have her hands full, but if anyone could do it, surely it was her.
That particular day, I started to find myself feeling envious and aching to have what she had. I started to feel how unfair it all was. All I could see and focus on was what I had lost. The pity party and the Why me‘s were in full effect.
Later that day, she and I began talking. In the midst of our conversation, she confided in me that she had lost two babies before she had her first son. And I stopped, right there. The girl who earlier in the day I had longed to have everything she had also had experienced exactly the same thing I had. The girl who had it all. She was the one in my mind with the white picket fences and yet she knew exactly what it was like to lose your absolute everything. She knew the torture and pain, the agony. I envied her and yet she was absolutely no different than me. And the lesson was learned–Comparison is the thief of joy.
When you look at someone on the outside and think that you know their story, think again. When it looks like someone has it all, it’s probably not true in the least. We look at others and tend to notice what we are lacking and assume that they have everything. But you never know. You just never know what someone else is going through. You never know if they have walked in almost the same shoes before you. Sure it may look like they have the world, but what meets the eye can be so far from reality. So stop comparing. Stop looking at others with the eyes of envy. Stop seeing what you lack and only noticing what others have. Don’t be robbed of the joy you may never know you could have.
Since summer is here, it’s time to bring out an easy and refreshing recipe that will surely bring a smile to your face. I got an ice cream maker recently, but I haven’t shared any of the recipes yet because not a lot of us may have a machine. So this Peaches and Cream “Ice Cream” does NOT require an ice cream maker. It doesn’t even really require more than about 5 minutes of your time so how about that!
The one piece of advice I have for this treat is to use fresh peaches that you freeze yourself. The flavor is just not the same if you buy pre-frozen peaches. Sure, it will still taste good, but fresh peaches will just seal the deal. The cream doesn’t have to be dairy either. You can use almond milk, coconut milk, and more. You just want something to add a more creamy texture to the mix. Other than that, you should be all set to go! Enjoy.
- 1 frozen banana
- 1 1/2 cups frozen sliced peaches
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 2-3 T 100 % pure maple syrup (optional as it may be sweet enough for you already!)
- 2- 3 T cream/milk of choice: almond milk, whipping cream, etc.
- In a food processor, process the banana and peaches for about 15-25 seconds at a time until the mixture starts to become smooth.
- Add in vanilla, your cream, and desired amount of maple syrup and process until a smooth soft-serve like consistency.
- Serve immediately, or if you prefer it a bit more solid, allow it to set in the freezer for about 1 hour.